Well maybe it's because we can't recognise that everyone can be an abuser, and that if you've abused someone that DOESN'T NECESSARILY DEFINE EVERYTHING YOU ARE. I'm not saying it doesn't deeply matter, but abusers are not monsters. Abusers are our loved ones, our complex friends, our lovers, ourselves. It's not something to celebrate, it's something to be aware of and recognised and thus guarded against in yourself.