This is the reason why I don't live in the future, but instead focus on enjoying the present. It doesn't mean that I don't have plans. But the future is so uncertain, and all we have now is NOW. So sacrificing happiness in the now for a future that may not come to pass makes no sense to me. Especially after a tragedy destroyed my hopes of spending my youth married to my soulmate. And attempting to become an egg donor led to me finding out I am most likely infertile. These things are very sad, but the way I find that helps me cope with them, is to focus on what I have in my present day life that I enjoy and love. After all, I don't know if a personal or collective apocalypse is right around the corner that will shatter all of my deepest held dreams. If it does, then I want to say that I didn't waste my life waiting for a future that never came. Instead, I enjoy the now. I would suggest that this focus could help you as well.