There are definitely disabled spouses who show love and appreciation to their spouse. Cole from "Roll with Cole and Charisma" on YouTube is a great example. He has a broken neck and his wife Charisma is his caregiver but they have a vibrant and extremely loving relationship and Cole does what he can to support Charisma in whatever means he can.

The OP's husband not only doesn't contribute, but he doesn't even show affection or appreciation.

You've been an absolute saint putting up with it. Not the disability but the poor treatment.

It's now time for you to enjoy your life. You deserve it.