Something I wonder is if erectile dys/disappointment is partly to do with the way people perceive their body parts as separate from the whole.

Thinking about times my partner has lost an erection during sex, and the times it has led to awkwardness vs the times it hasn’t, is that the good times are when the man is “lost in the eroticism” and sees the penis as only one appendage to feel pleasure and give pleasure with — if your hand cramps during sex does that have to make you feel like shit? No, you shift hands, or change position, or use your tongue or a plethora of different options.

Sex is a full body experience, and a full body connection, not just a peg in a hole.