Really?

"If the condom feels uncomfortable, chances are you're not using it properly" - because there's no reason why a condom could be inherently uncomfortable when compared to not wearing a condom?

"There's more behind these excuses" - because apparently a man saying "sex is better without a condom" shouldn't be taken at face value?

"The secret enemy of erections isn't a condom, it's toxic masculinity" - because that's the only thing that could be affecting one's erection, it can't be a physical sensation right?

"The two main reasons behind "I don't want to wear a condom" are sexual ignorance and toxic masculinity" - that's a huge assumption to make and lump onto millions of people who have different anatomy to you and about an experience you'll never have to have.

This article makes out that the only valid sex is sex with a condom, and that if you don't want to have this kind of sex, if you don't want to have a condom you MUST be sexually ignorant or have fallen into the trap of toxic masculinity. Because there's no other way to prevent pregnancy or STDs than condoms, right? Wait, condoms are actually only about 75% effective at preventing pregnancy? And STDs can be prevented by regular testing (especially if you're in a committed monogamous relationship)? Wow who knew?

This article is incredibly judgemental of anyone who doesn't want to wear a condom. Which is a really common thing for people with penises to feel. Including my husband.

In my view - it's not inherently a sign of toxic masculinity to not want to wear a condom. I wouldn't want to have sex with a big latex bandaid over my clitoris. Or to wear a "sheath" (the female version of a condom where it goes inside the vagina). I wouldn't want to wear a dental dam either.

So if you are a person that doesn't want to wear a condom, that's valid. What's important is to respect people's boundaries sexually. So if you don't want to wear a condom, and the person you want to have sex with demands you wear a condom, you have a choice. Either wear the condom, or don't have sex, or find a third solution that makes you both comfortable (like waiting to have sex until you've both been tested for STDs, they found out you have a vasectomy or something else, everyone is different).

Pressuring someone who doesn't want to have sex without a condom is not OK. Neither is stealthing, obviously.

But trying to guilt trip men who don't want to wear condoms, into having the kind of sex they don't want to have, because if they don't they're ignorant/toxic - that's also not OK.

I never said that women's health isn't important btw. I am a woman. I care about my sexual health. There are plenty of ways to have a sexually healthy relationship without condoms. I have one. I'm not saying that any woman who doesn't want to pursue other options should just get over it and be OK with not using a condom - everyone's sexual boundaries are their boundaries and should be respected. But it's not inherently "not caring about a woman's sexual health" to not want to wear a condom ffs. That's simplistic rhetoric that's not supported by the wide array of sexual health services and contraceptives that are out there.