Interesting article Ryan.

It makes me think of my beloved Chinese stepmother who recently told my brothers and I that she couldn’t be in our lives anymore because we caused her too much pain. Then she blocked us all.

None of us had any idea of what we’d done since we had always been loving, kind and welcoming to her. We’re all adults living independently. While we like to visit her and Dad every week or two, and text more frequently, we don’t see her every day but that’s normal for Western culture.

I found out yesterday that the reason for her behaviour to us was apparently because she’d had expectations for how we would behave according to Chinese culture and she was hurt that we didn’t. Unfortunately I have no idea what those expectations even were because she didn’t tell us.

I love her very much and it’s so sad to feel cut off from her. Whatever the cultural expectations are, I wish she could tell me what she wants and we could talk about what’s a realistic expectation from adult children raised in Western culture. 😞 There is a lot about Chinese culture that I love and admire but things like this I just don’t understand and I wish I did.