I have several reasons I don't want to have kids. Some fall into "Vance Stance", some fall into "Modern life strife", some fall into your theory. All are valid.

1. I do like raving, I do like having coffee unmolested, I like free time. I already feel I don't have enough of it with my busy job. I also like disposable income and being able to travel overseas for fun, buy pretty clothes and plants. (Vance stance)

2. Even with an above average paying job, it's hard to buy property as a millennial, even if I don't have kids and I don't own a car. If I had a kid my (and their) quality of life would decrease. (Modern life strife)

3. My mother passed several genetic characteristics to me that means pregnancy and childbirth would likely leave me with permanent negative health effects. Such as uterine prolapse, pre-eclampsia, hip dysplasia. These things happened to her and majorly negatively affected her life, leaving her with chronic pain that needed opiates to manage. I don't want that to happen to me.

4. I'm the breadwinner in my relationship and taking time off to look after a baby would impact my career and then either working from home or doing childcare would be a hit to my career/finances.

5. I don't want to pass on the cycle of abuse from my mother to another child. While I would do my best not to, my mother also did her best and yet her best was not enough to prevent the cycle.

6. My parents' relationship majorly suffered after having kids. They became more like roommates than lovers and divorced after the kids left the nest. I don't want that to happen to my partner and I.

7. From what I hear of motherhood, it becomes an all-consuming obsession for women - their whole identity is restructured around "motherhood". Individual interests no longer matter. All is sacrificed to the altar of childcare. No thanks.

8. I have so many other things I want to do with my life. Open an animal sanctuary. Become a therapist. Become a landscape architect. Become an author, become an artist. Become a death doula. I contribute to the world in many other ways.

9. I tried to donate eggs and the fertility clinic told me afterwards I was likely infertile and wouldn't be allowed to donate again, because they only harvested 10 eggs in the cycle, only 6 survived extraction, and all died during implantation. That was when I was 28. It's only going to get worse from there.

10. My husband is currently incarcerated anyway and there's no way I would want to have a baby with anyone else or to raise a baby as a single mum.

11. I genuinely have never felt the strong desire to have kids. At most I have felt ambivalent about it, in that there are some parts that appeal to me but none to the extent that it would counteract the parts that don't appeal to me. I feel to be a parent I should really really really want kids, and I don't.

All in all - I don't want kids. The more time goes on the more certain about that I feel. Some reasons may be selfish, some are not. But all are valid.